Families are an unforgiving group.

I picked up the People magazine this morning and read the article about Tatum O'Neal entitled "Finding Forgiveness" (May 24, 2010, p. 67). It tells about the steps she has taken to make reconciliation with her father, actor Ryan O'Neal after a long alienation. In a voice mail from him, he made reference to the film Love Story with reference to the familiar line which echoed through the hearts and minds of those who saw it, "Love means never having to say you're sorry". I had to wonder where he intended to go from there if he was not intending to apologize. Starting fresh is fine but don't you have to make reference to how you got into this stalemate in the first place.

The article goes on: they met at a restaurant, he said he was sorry and she realized that she needed him in her life more than she needed to hang on to what had happened in that past. She acknowledged that she needed hope and healing to overcome the darkness which, at times, had enveloped her. Her lead statement verifies this "I take responsibility for what was my part--but forgiveness is forgiveness."

Who knows whether this relationship will continue to be strong! No guarantees in this life. But the point that I take from this is that nothing has to be permanent so long as people have life. There is a risk in making a move to reconcile, true. Feuding family members have to come to a point of asking if the risk is worth taking knowing the ploys of the past and the failures.