Emotional Fallout

I had an incidence yesterday that reminded me that the alienation between two parties affects many people who are just in that emotional vicinity. Pam F. called me about something that has long been in the planning in the family (which I had a big part in that planning) and acted like I would still come down for the event and big a regular part. Pam often twists words so that they appear like she wants them to appear and I had to jump in and tell her not to tell anyone that I would be there. She was not in charge of my decisions. I hated it because I like her but I also know that I have to watch out for her interpretation of other people's words.

I got off of the phone and thought about people who have gotten caught up in my rages of unforgiveness. It is a form of un-nuclear fallout. Nuclear fallout is what falls from the sky after a nuclear explosion with debris and ash so thick that it beats out the sun from view. This fallout produces both immediate and delayed destructive effects

So does the fallout which results after a family or work or neighborhood explosion. It makes you concentrate so hard on the bad that the good people and past good acts and relationships are hidden from one's sun. And there is no time limitation on how long the bad will filter out the good.

I have to start repairing the fallout from my alienations. My children and grandchildren, nieces and nephews and friends have been sucked into this inferno because of their love for me and they can do nothing but rotate and twist in the flame. So to those who call me and give their support--to my brother, to my niece, Betty Ann, to Jennie and Rose Marie, my sisters and to my friends, Joan, Bev, Debbie and Greg, I say thanks for caring. I will try to do one better than I have done. And to Pam, I will attempt to take a few steps but don't push it and don't interpret for me!