Shunning is a waste of energy

I wish I could look back on the last few years and say I had had a tremendous success in putting the pieces of my life back together but that would be a flat out lie!  I still despise my ex-husband for his philandering and I hate the whore he married (though I wouldn't wish her on a dog).  I still have nothing to do with the exPresident of the University who lied thru his teeth when he did not renew my contract but he got his in the neck.  My sister's children do not speak to me because I insisted that she take care of my brothers will as it was written by him and some don't speak to me because I took care of their mothers, etc!

But what I have done well is to go on with my life in spite of their intended malice and forge a new kind of positive life.   Some might call it shunning but I call it self-preservation and it has taken me into a life of love and satisfaction!   Do I miss the drama of it all?  No!  Nor do I miss the negativity or the back biting!   I handle the relationships that occur;  but I just don't set up the happenings!   I was at my lawyer's house for a party recently and he said, "What's your crazy family doing to you now?"  Most of them have been deleted from my cell phone so I have no contact!   Wishing won't change the game; neither will jumping back into the old rules!  Someone has said,  "We shun to protect ourselves, to draw essential boundaries!"   

The boundaries give direction...and a sense of personal peace!